[Culturechat] Culture Shock

[Vance Roy]

FIRST: Let me say that I am a citizen of The United States of America,
first, last, and always. I pay U.S. taxes and have a U. S. passport.
This won't change. SECOND: I have no illusions that CH is Utopia by any
means. (Got to be careful of all those large case words. They can get
you into a pot of trouble. Right S?) Third: as always, anyone who feels
that I am "dissing" the USA always has the print, roll, and you have to
guess the rest; the chat Gestapo are everywhere. On to the subject after
this disclaimer.

OK, I won't really say that I am a victim of culture shock. Maybe
"culture surprise" is a better characterization. CS works traveling both ways.

Other than the two years that I was a POW at the U. S. Naval Hospital in
Boston, I have never spent any appreciable time in New England. Well,
surprise! I am now in Rhode Island, and I will be here for a part of
each year. Other than RI of course, I will be in the USA. Each of these
have given me a bit of a CS (culture surprise).

Until recently, my visits to the USA have been measured in days, or at
most less than a month. These times were broken up into visits with
various people in different places. There was no time to absorb a
culture. That has changed somewhat now. 

During the flight over to Boston comes the first thing out of the
ordinary. This form for customs that they pass out. Going to CH, they
could care less what you want to bring in. Not really, but almost. If
you have a valid passport (Hal made it in once without this) and even
look like that you may have had a WASP in your family background, you
are in there. It does make things go faster if you are not bringing in
ten kilos of butter or cheese. Believe me, I can see the wisdom in the
U. S. Customs procedures; it is just something different. Then for the
big shocker. Boston. A massive airport sitting on the precipice of the
"Big Dig". Crowds of people speaking what sounds as if it could be a
language related to English but not quite. Cars, buses, trucks, and
whatever all trying to squeeze into tiny lanes between massive pieces of
construction equipment and detour barriers again perched on the edge of
a man made Grand Canyon that is likely the best example there ever will
be of a hole into which money (legal and illegal) has, and is, being
poured. Cab drivers duking it out in the middle of the street. It is
enough to make me regress to my old Boston personality with which I
survived my POW years (being as nasty as I can be with a pleasant look
on my face, using some words that my mother never taught me, and by
doing this gaining the trust of the natives that I won't seduce them by
using anything that could remotely be called good manners.)

Next comes the Interstate Highway System. This was a marvel that I saw
built in my lifetime. It had a short life, and now, in spite of the gas
prices, it is obsolete. 4-6 lanes of traffic choking the way to
Providence. Most cars carrying one person who looks like a horse in
blinders and is usually talking into a cell phone. Gradually this
dissipates into the best scenery this side of CH, Aquidneck Island,
Newport, and the beaches.

Rhode Island is a small state. CH is a small country. Something seems
good about that. The residents of Newport are used to obscene rates for
everything. Food, lodging, real estate, etc. are expensive as they are
in CH. I feel more at home already. This time of year all are
anticipating the lemming like onslaught of the Manhattenites who come
from "The City" each summer to try and maintain their sanity. The
drivers in RI are a different breed than those in Boston. Instead of
guerilla warfare, people actually stop and wave you through a left turn
or onto a main street. This takes some acclimation. I was afraid that it
was a come on for a broadside until I saw it done to others. Again, it
reminds me of CH. A visit to the post office which I thought would
result in the need for a flak jacket. It did not. On the contrary, I was
met with something akin to southern hospitality. This wasn't a fluke. I
did it several times to make sure that it was real. I find the people in
RI to have a special manner about them. Talk about Yankee brogue! It
could take the paint off a wall. Could be close to the "Schweizer
Deutsch" that I hear at home.

BUT??? (Devil made me do it). Where are the mountains? Not a berg in
sight. Ocean and beach but no pinnacles into the sky. There are great
seaside places for a walk or a run, but this place needs some mountains
in the worst way. On the other hand, one can walk to the beach, and the
sea aroma can be very pleasant.

A visit to my favorite grocery store reminds me again of the plenty in
this country. Again, like CH. The USA seems to have become one big snake
oil show at times. Vitamins, minerals, supplements from trees and roots,
as well as oyster shells. Take this for memory, this for vision, this
for that, etc. A million dollars seems to be on everyone's lips right
after "Survivor". The television shows have it all. A channel
exclusively devoted to everything except ax murder on the cable system.
The %#@**&^% commercials! Every eight minutes the latest news for
consumers on everything. There is no sanctity on anything anymore. If
you are too dry, they can fix it. If you are too wet, they can fix that
too. If you excrete too much or too little, never fear, there is help in
this or that potion. At least with the ever present commercials for soap
powder and panty liners in CH, we are given the whole program in between
the five minutes of propaganda at the beginning and end. The quality of
some of the drivel is the same here as in CH. Who needs to hear from the
housewife whose husband left her for the family cat, or the woman who
gave birth to an alien? Do these folks really have anything to say that
will enrich our lives?

The lights, the lights!!!! All on and always on. The house next door is
totally, and I mean it all, illuminated all night long. I fear it won't
be long until I am walking out of the house and leaving the lights on.
On the other hand, at least in RI, recycling is easier. Just drag it to
the curb. In CH one has to load it or tie it up.

Enough for now. More comes to mind each day.

-- 
Vance C. Roy
gigli.saw@dplanet.ch